My weight woes and vows

To tell you where I am and where I am going, let me start with where it all began.

Origin of weight issues:

As a kid I guess I was never fat. I hardly ever thought about the words 'fat' or 'weight', so that's how I know I wasn't :) I was never athletic though and barely tolerated physical education and gym, I like to think I'm more a cerebral and artsy person. It was after high school and during undergrad that I put on some weight as my activity levels decreased and my genes started showing their true colors. I was always on the high side of normal, but not really overweight and I remember myself as the chubby girl. I put on more weight when I started working and was around 10-12 pounds overweight.

The tipping point:

But it was after marriage that my weight skyrocketed. I am married to a wonderful man and very frequent eating out and delicious (that means fattening) super sized meals coupled with little to no exercise or even walking around soon made me add 30 pounds more in a span as short as a year! That put me at 40-50 pounds above normal. I used to lose weight at times but any small turbulence would see me slip right off and all the weight would creep right back in. And then some. Finally, I reached 170 pounds by Jan 2011, which is around 70 kgs. That was my personal upper limit, it set off red flags, and to top it all, I saw an embarrassing video of myself dancing in front of a crowd of 300 and only then it hit me how fat I was. I think dear mirror mirror on the wall is a bad liar, you only see a projection of your mental image. But it's pix and vix which give you a reality check. Anyway, I had had enough of it and decided to be in this for the long haul.

A hard look at myself and my habits:

I wanted to lose weight successfully this time. I wanted to get back at everybody who thought I was fat. I wanted to wear the clothes all my effortlessly skinny friends wore and not look like Queen Latifah. More than all that, I wanted to lose weight to show myself I cannot fail. That I can achieve what I set out to do. So, if it was going to be any different this time, I had to go about it differently as well. I could not expect to do the same things and expect different results. For this, I had to closely examine what I was doing before that I shouldn't be doing again. 

Which is precisely what I'll tell you about in the next post.